My response to dVerse Poets Pub Poetics – Choose a Line. This week Mary has asked us to read the poem “Burning the Old Year” by Naomi Shihab Nye, choose one of the lines & use it as a line in a newly written poem.
I have chosen the line: ‘Notes friends tied to the doorknob’.
My train of thought
Is haunted
By well-chosen words
Written on mauled
Scraps of paper,
Notes friends tied to the doorknob
When I refused to let them in.
Cradled in paperiness
And desiccated tears,
I trace the light of language
That lingers in my carrion dawn,
A lifeline in the deepening shadows.
© Kim M. Russell, 2016
Oooh, had to shudder a little at this imagery, as it describes so perfectly those suffering from depression, when they feel they cannot let their friends in to help, nor believe they can be helped. Clear, poignant, startling imagery.
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A brilliant use of the line and you capture how important it is to hold on to those words of friendship in our darkest times.
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Thank you. It’s sometimes hard to see that light.
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You are welcome. Yes, it is!
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Beautifully written and fresh way of weaving that line from Naomi ~
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Such rich imagery in this poem. Nicely done.
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This is deeply rich in image and evocative verse 🙂
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In our depression we push away help or a friendly gesture, but still I would have loved even a note- still would.
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I love the “carrion dawn” and all the rest too!
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And, oh yes, those well chosen words can sometimes be so very haunting! “Carrion dawn” says so much! And hopefully as the shadows deepen a lifeline CAN be seen!
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mauled scraps of paper… this is so painful.. and I can so understand the closed door.
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I tend to hold tightly to the deepening shadows myself. The are sanctuary sometimes! This poem bursts with passion!
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Thank you, Walt 🙂
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powerful
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Chilling and powerful images, Kim! I like how you move from realistic instances to the darkness of the thoughts.
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No
Age..
No Gender..
No Nationality..
No Color..
No Creed..
No Dis
abiliTy..
sexual
orientation..
or other..
Difference
BeInG Love..:)
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