Parting at Dawn

This is a very late response to Jane Dougherty’s Poetry challenge #44: Ghazal

For some reason, I haven’t been seeing Jane’s challenges lately and I hated missing this one – I haven’t come across a ghazal before – it’s a tricky one and I do love a challenge…

…which was to write a ghazal, a love poem on the theme of dawn:  with each line of the same length; the first and second lines ending on a rhyme, not necessarily the same word; although rhythm isn’t obligatory, try to get a flow going; and the final stanza should refer to the poet’s name. I’m not sure if I have fulfilled all the criteria – please feel free to make suggestions for improvement.

Parting at Dawn

The Dawn by John La Farge, 1899, oil on canvas – Fogg Art Museum, Harvard University – DSC01212.jpg

 

Pushing aside fluidity of morning,

You are aware that outside day is dawning.

 

She’s still asleep, dreams flutter on her eyelids,

Unaware that a brand new day is dawning.

 

Woken by a blackbird singing in the garden,

Her eyes open to the gentle day’s dawning.

 

Stretching and yawning she rises and gets dressed,

Preparing herself for another day that’s dawning.

 

How eager Kim’s lips as she kisses you goodbye,

Mourning your parting for another day dawning.

 

© Kim M. Russell, 2016

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7 thoughts on “Parting at Dawn

  1. You are the only one of us who even attempted to add the poet’s name in the final couplet, so bravo for that! Like almost everyone, you didn’t notice the sly, tricksy little rule about the internal rhyme on the word immediately preceding the refrain. It’s such a difficult form, this one, I’ll probably bring it out again when we’ve all recovered, and insist on the internal rhyme 🙂 I’ll add yours to the round-up. Thanks for pitching in 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Jane. 🙂 It was a little difficult to juggle everything. I did see the sly, tricksy little rule but decided to focus on the other ones and have another go at including the internal rhyme a later time! At least now I know what a ghazal is and can recognise one at 100 paces!

      Like

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