NaPoWriMo Day 3: Two Opposite Poems

The Light

However I dismiss the light
as white concrete
or the sun as a still-standing cube,
now here’s something to be unconcerned about,
absolutely.

(Including humans…)

Aircraft

In the beginning,
it was so much more
than the girl’s real biplane
beneath the distant desert,
where you ran with me.

And we stood up
to ignore them departing,
their black stumble proud
with achromatic darkness,
the early moon
silvering the stillness
that dragged them down,

your aircraft leaving
without their emptiness of despair.

Kim M. Russell, 3rd April 2023

Image by Patrick Hendry on Unsplash

NaPoWriMo Day three has us writing ‘opposite’ poems.

Firstly, find short-ish poems that we like.

Then rewrite each line, replacing each word (or as many words as we can) with words that mean the opposite. For example, turning “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?” to “I won’t contrast you with a winter’s night”.

Finally, the first draft may need a little polishing.

This is a fun way to respond to a poem, while learning how that poem’s rhetorical strategies really work.

I have chosen two poems by Carol Ann Duffy, one of my favourite poets: ‘The Dark’ and ‘Ship’.

18 thoughts on “NaPoWriMo Day 3: Two Opposite Poems

    1. The prompts for yesterday and today were both quite time-consuming, which can limit the length and quality of a poem. But then, the poems we post are usually first drafts. I tend to go back to them at a later date and they become something different all on their own!

      Liked by 1 person

  1. Your poems arrived just when I was preparing dinner. Read and fell for them instantly. But then wanted to read the original before replying.
    Thanks for introducing me to Carol Ann Duffy.
    And yours are splendid. To me they read like edited pieces.
    The first one is adorable. Switched aliens for humans. Hehe it’s a fact. A sad one.

    And the second: well the second. Yes! All of it. Thanks, Kim. Lovely. Blessings.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Hope they lasted for you all day. I. So glad to have helped somehow. Blessings on the rest of your day. Mine is coming to an end. Wish I did t need to sleep so I could read more poetry. Do it for me, please.
        📚 💗 thanks, Kim

        Liked by 1 person

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