Last night I didn’t gaze at
lights in the November sky.
Long beyond midnight, even
longer into early morn,
lingering solitary,
lids drooped as I listened to
legendary sisters’ songs.
Leaning against the willow,
lulled by silver harmony,
lovely cosmic chords became
laments for a lost sister,
lugubrious Pleiades
lilting quietly to me.
Kim M. Russell, 24th November 2020
My response to dVerse Poets Pub Poetics: Stars that count
Laura is back with a Poetics challenge, this time starry-eyed from watching the seven sisters of the Pleiades. She has shared stellar poetry by other stargazers: Sappho, Walt Whitman, Marjorie Pickthall and Anne Spencer.
Her challenge has several options. We can write a poem using the Pleiades form; pick a one-word title and then write a seven-line poem of seven syllables, whereby each line begins with the first letter of the title. Or, since only 6 of the Pleiades are now visible to the naked eye and some Greek legends explore what might have happened to the missing sister, Merope, sometimes called the Lost Pleiad, we may prefer to write the Pleiades form with just six lines of six syllables. Or we can write an acrostic poem of Pleiades or its derivative Pleiadian.
Choices, choices! Whichever we choose, the theme should be topical – within the cosmos, a mythology, or be pertinent to ‘seven’.
I found it hard to stick to one, so I wrote two stanzas: the first in the Pleiades form, the second a Lost Pleiad. (Image found on Pinterest)
I think they went very well together… the first you the observer, the second with the lost pleiad and the sister lamenting.
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Thank you, Bjorn. A few years ago I wrote and posted a poem about the Pleiades, but not in that form. There were two versions: the first in 2016 for Gayle’s prompt for the fifth anniversary celebration, and the second in 2018 for Amaya’s Poetics( Pentimento).
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Kim I loved how you chose both the Pleiades forms and gave the lost sister topic appropriate to the sestet version in such haunting lines
“lulled by silver harmony,
lovely cosmic chords became
laments for a lost sister,”
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Thanks so much, Laura. I enjoyed writing both forms – something I will come back to in the future.
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Both poems sparkle, and eclipse the form, and soar into their own strata. I tried the Acrostic as well.
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Thank you, Glenn. I’ll be over to read shortly.
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You’ve risen to the challenge beautifully here, Kim – there is a lullaby lilt and lyrical quality to your words!
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Thank you for your kind comment, Ingrid!
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It almost feels like you are the lost sister they are calling for here, Kim. Beautiful!
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Thank you, Lisa. I am a lost sister, one of three.
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You are welcome, Kim.
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Doubly delicious, KR. This form’s not really up my alley, but i gave it a try. You outshine me greatly. Salute!
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Thanks Ron. I’ll be back in the morning to read and comment.😊
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The two pieces work well together, and would stand alone even without the Pleiades story behind them. I know alliteration is kind of inevitable here, but you really use those lulling “l” sounds so well.
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Thanks Sarah!
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Enjoyed!!!
Happy Tuesday
Much🖤love
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Thanks Gillena!
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soothing, like a lullaby (K)
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Lovely how the two pieces pair so well together yet stand on their own merit.
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I’m so glad you think so, Eugenia!
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😉
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They two worked well together Kim, as though teo halves of a whole. Well written!
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I’m delighted you enjoyed them, Rob!
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Lovely in form and message, Kim!
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Thanks so much, Lynn!
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Very well done Kim. I liked your listening to the sisters sad song!
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Thank you, Dwight!
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laments for a lost sister,
The lost sister is not forgotten! Wonderful double Kim!
Hank
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Thank you, Hank!
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Excellent.
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Cheers Francis!
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Whoa! Hats off, Kim. Your word artistry is stellar!
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Thank you, Jay!
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I couldn’t stay up long enough to write any comments last night, but I could see the Pleiades through the crack in the half-opened shutter, and I might even have heard their lament for their lost sister. Thanks, Kim 🙂
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😊🌃
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Beautiful.
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Thank you, Mary.
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This is so well done, Kim. I didn’t even notice the use of L for the beginning of every line until I was in the second stanza I was so intent on the meaning and the flow. I especially liked these words
“lingering solitary,
lids drooped as I listened to
legendary sisters’ songs.”
I enjoyed this very much!
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Thank you very much, Lill! Enjoy Thanksgiving, we’ll miss you at OLN Live.
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